Life is fleeting🤐 @MomentsWithBren Educational Equity. Decent Work Opportunities. Learning and Development. Mental Models. Heutagogy. Program Design and Evaluation. Personal Growth. May. 17, 2020 6 min read

Many people are alive today because of second chance that life has offered them. It's an established fact that bad friends will lead you to an early grave. It's feels exciting when people who rejoice in evil and trouble are busy clapping and cheering you up when you misbehave.

It takes a positive transformation for you to renew your mind. In addition, it is wise to consider not only how potential friends treat us but also how they treat others, particularly those from whom they have nothing to gain.

Getting to know someone’s true character requires patience and skill, as well as time to observe the person in real life.

“Counsel in the heart of a man is as deep waters, but the man of discernment is one that will draw it up.” (Proverbs 20:5)

If you are interested in making friends with someone, you might want to ask yourself, ‘Who are his or her friends?’ The type of close associates someone has tells much about the person himself. Also, what opinion do other eople in the community have of this person?

When you begin to have many regrets in your life because of friends, this is life sending you a signal to change the people in your circle.

Be wary of people who are always there to support your toxic behaviour.

Human beings were created to be social creatures, meaning that we are most comfortable when we have family, friends and acquaintances. At the same time, those who call themselves our friends may cause us trouble, grief and hardship.

Bad friends will make you waste your life.

Proverbs 6:27-28
Can a man scoop fire into his bosom without burning his clothes? Can a man walk on hot coals without scorching his feet?

"Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy."

Proverbs 22:24-25 Do not be a friend of one who has a bad temper, and never keep company with a hothead, or you will learn his ways and set a trap for yourself.

A toxic friendship can cause a lot of damage, emotionally, mentally, even physically.

Some friendships produce a very positive impact on us, while others produce a very negative impact. It is the difference between one who is a true friend and one who is a toxic friend. A toxic friendship can cause a lot of damage, emotionally, mentally, even physically.

A toxic friend will push you to do things that you are uncomfortable with, even things you know are wrong. If you recognize toxic qualities in a friendship, something needs to change. You can’t afford to wait and hope the situation will change itself—it’s time to take action!

Toxic friends are pushy and demanding, and they will use criticism, negative feedback and other emotionally manipulative ways to coerce you with guilt into doing what they want. They are not interested in your welfare, but rather in what they can get from you.

The fact that someone else has had a difficult time in life is not a reason you should reap the consequences!  You must be careful about what you allow in our own life. Be mindful of a relationship consistently leaves you feeling drained, rather than satisfied and content.

If you’re in a toxic relationship, it’s up to you to change it! Casting blame on the other person may be convenient, but it is generally unproductive. You need to find out why you are letting yourself be treated with such disrespect.

All relationships/friendships require personal boundaries. Boundaries are guidelines or limits that define how you interact with others, and how you allow other people to treat you. They are defined by your core values, which say a lot about you. Setting boundaries is important.

Boundaries take time to develop and are fluid.If you need to talk through some boundaries with your friend, do it in a kind and patient manner. Setting boundaries with friends is one thing, but making sure your friends respect them is something else.

Boundaries are meant to keep friends feeling safe & comfortable in a relationship. They are not meant to be rigid or cause tension. The main benefit of boundaries is that you can relax in the friendship and be yourself. Everyone has a different idea of what's comfortable to them.

Your ability to say no to others may demonstrate that you have self-respect. You recognize when certain people or situations may be unsafe and you stay away.

Ask yourself what type of boundaries are you allowing in your friendships.

• Permeable
• Impermeable

Or you are able to identify when you are getting overloaded with responsibilities, and you speak up in order to take care of yourself or prevent yourself from having so much to do that you don’t do a good job on anything.

People who have very permeable boundaries are always letting people in who prove to be dangerous to them in some form or another. They put others’ wants and desires before their own needs, and they become easy targets for those who are seeking to take advantage.


As distasteful or difficult as it may be, if you’ve tried to establish some better boundaries with your toxic friend and nothing changes, then it may be necessary to get out of this relationship. A person like that may never respect you or see you as an equal.

The best way to know the difference between a toxic friendship and a healthy one is to hang out with people who aren’t toxic! Hopefully, you already know at least one person like this, but if not, then you need to carefully consider where you are finding your so-called friends.

A good friend will not try to lead you to do things that are wrong or hurtful, but rather is there to support you and encourage you to make right, healthy and proper choices in your life. Have friends you can get together with, and afterward feel uplifted, refreshed & motivated.

To have good friendships👀💡

If you already have worthy companions, why not see what you can do to strengthen your friendship with them? Longtime friends are a particularly precious treasure, and we should treat them as such. Never take their loyalty for granted.

True friends don’t flatter. They tell the truth, even when their honesty may sting. In Proverbs 27:6 King Solomon was inspired to write, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”

Make a connection with someone you enjoy being with, who doesn’t use or abuse you or your time, pay attention to what’s different about this relationship so that you can focus on finding those qualities in others—and being a true friend yourself.

Avoid bad people.

I woke up this morning with the thought of my late uncle. During his last minutes on earth, he left a message about the dangers of keeping bad friends. My uncle kept saying, "make una no follow bad friends. Make una avoid bad people......" until he died that morning before 5a.m.

Some of you know how you escaped death, detention, and other negative events because you made an INTENTIONAL DECISION in life. You told yourself enough is enough which is the reason why you are still alive. I call it the EoE (enough is enough) moment of realization.

Be wise!!

I believe that whatever or whoever you don't confront (address), will consume (destroy/ruin) you someday. In this context, a negative thing/activity/habit/interest or person.

May we receive wisdom and the discipline to navigate life.

Udo (Peace)✌🏿

You can follow @MomentsWithBren.


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