Patrick McKenzie+ Your Authors @patio11 I work for the Internet, at @stripe, mostly on accelerating startups. Opinions here are my own. Sep. 01, 2020 1 min read + Your Authors

Branch manager: "Last issue and I'm very sorry to have to bring this up. If I can direct you to page X paragraph 4 of the 125 page KYC fax, can you please read to me the third number in that line?"
Me: "*does so*"
Bank: "If I may be so bold: that strikes me as likely incorrect."

Me: "Oh goodness, in converting from a numeric representation to a written representation in Japanese, I dropped a trailing zero."
Bank: "That would make the calculation from USD to yen much more plausible. May I report to HQ that is what happened?"
Me: "Of course."

Bank: "Compliance asked me to check. I tried to tell them that if they just looked on page 67 where you pulled the original USD number from that that was transposed correctly and it is confirmed on page 102 so this was a simple clerical error not requiring a call but, you know."

Me: "You read that fax... very thoroughly."
Bank: "You wrote it very thoroughly. I'm sorry I did not catch the typo prior to Compliance flagging it; could have fixed it myself if I had. Anyhow, thanks as always, apologies for consuming so much of your time on KYC this month."

My friends keep asking me why I don't just use BigBank already but how can you not love them.

Yes, when not working on the financial infrastructure of the Internet, I indulge in my thrilling hobby of Japanese regional bank wire transfer compliance influencer.

You can follow @patio11.


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